As I sat here fiddling with the appearance of the blog, I did a quick flipping through the “pages” and “pages” of posts. I can’t believe how much I have written. Okay, typed. It is not until one looks back at physical evidence that the reality of change, of volume, of time, of hopefully growth, is revealed.
I have been blogging for a few years…YEARS!!! Crazy!
It has been quite a ride. I scanned some content and every so often there is a bit of substance, for a while I became so consumed with quantity that I have many “cheats.” I define these as the scoop.its. I suppose it was owed to my wanting to share with you what I saw.
I look at the past few days and the quantity is scarce.
I will hit a stride. All I need is time.
My time usurper is quite needy still. He does not allow for much to occur other than the necessary cooking and cleaning. Yay! Lucky me! Tell me, why can’t THAT be the thing for which time is non-existent?
I really am not complaining though, no matter how that phrase sounds. I am actually enjoying being at home now. 🙂
I get to spend my day with my Munchkins. Granted, 4 and 5 are now full day in school, but I still get to prep breakfast, pack their lunches, see them off, welcome them home, cook for them, help with homework…it’s actually quite nice.
I will confess that I do lose sight of the joy of being at home many, many times, especially when the Time Usurper is extremely needy and clingy thereby inhibiting any type of progress in, well, anything! Or when I am struggling with 5’s learning to read. I am very much like this:
Though she is in SK, believe me, she still does this! Drives Daddy a bit more crazy than it does me, but either way…sigh.
Again, I really do love being at home. Perhaps much is owed to my being more mature now (not old, mature…as if I am ever going to grow up. HA!). The reality of my getting older is setting in. The Time Usurper is probably our last child, and knowing this kind of breaks my heart. I try to soak up as much as I can. I hold him, I play with him, I love smelling his breath (sounds weird, I know, but it smells so sweet!! ♥ I Love It!), and I am still nursing him as well.
The breastfeeding does take up quite a bit of time. Days it is a true Blessing, for were it not for that, I would not get to sit and relax for a bit. Other days, well, if I am on a time constraint, it is rather nerve-racking, but then I see him smile or be silly, and believe me, it’s worth it ♥
Due to all the time he requires, 4 and 5 don’t get much time with me. 😦
4 has wanted to draw and colour with me for a couple of days now, and I honestly have not been able to do so, it is on my list for tomorrow as a Must!
And here is where I tell you that no matter how deprived 4 and 5 may seem, it’s my 3 older Babies that still get the short end of the stick.
Do you know that to this day I still keep hoping they’ll come…I guess I will never stop Praying for that Miracle ♥
Hope has moved in, truth be told. 2 said he is coming out to stay for a bit. Of course he said that almost a month ago now…
But you never know. Perhaps he will come and once he is here he will decide to go to University here! A Mom can dream…
So much to share, but enough for today.
Much Love and God Bless †